Neil deGrasse Tyson Owes Emmy a Cookie

I’m watching an episode of NOVA scienceNOW (eccentric capitalization makes it hip!), and Neil deGrasse Tyson is doing a segment on extrasolar planets. I’m only half listening, because I’m also trying to keep SteelyKid from trying to eat any of the furniture, but it’s quite good.

All of a sudden, Emmy’s head snaps up. “Hey!” she says. “He owes me a cookie!”

“What?” I ask. “Who owes you a cookie?”

“The human on the tv. He was just explaining science using dogs. Inferior dogs. That’s my job!”

“Technically, it’s my job. I’m the one who does all the writing, after all.” I rewind the DVR a bit to see what she’s talking about. It’s an analogy between the “wobble” method of detecting extrasolar planets, and detecting the presence of a dog by looking at the way its owner is tugged while on a walk.

“That’s a good analogy,” I say, “and totally the sort of thing I would’ve used had we talked about extrasolar planets in the book. We didn’t use it, though.”

“Yeah, but the dogs-and-physics thing is our idea. He’s stealing our idea. And he’s probably getting paid for it to, so he owes me a cookie.”

“He’s not stealing our idea. This is a case of independent invention, like with Newton and Leibniz independently inventing the calculus at the same time.” SteelyKid is trying to crawl under the end table to get at the Roomba, so I scoop her up and set her back down by the toy box.

“Or Feynman, Schwinger, and Tomonoga each coming up with quantum electro-dynamics in the late 1940’s?”

“Sure, I guess that would work, too. The combination of dogs and science is just too good an idea to pass up. Dogs and science go together like, like…”

“Steak and cheese?”

“Sure, like steak and cheese.”

“Or bacon and cheese. That’s good, too.”

“Bacon and cheese would also work, yes.” SteelyKid attempts to pick up a rubber duck the size of her head, and thumps down into a sitting position with a surprised look on her face.

“Or peanut butter and cheese. Or cookies and cheese. Or steak and peanut butter and bacon and cheese. And cookies.”

“OK, that’s five things, not two. You need just two to make a good analogy.”

“Yeah, but you need all five to make a really great treat. I’d settle for a cookie, though.”

“Well, if I ever meet him, I’ll be sure to pass that along,” I say. “I wouldn’t hold out too much hope for a cookie, though.”

“BA BA BA BA BA!” says SteelyKid, banging the duck on the floor.